Our voice reflection is such a powerful verbal tool in negotiations. We can literally use our voices to reach into people’s thinking and effect their moods by flipping their emotional switches.
Many people will unconsciously move from mistrusting to trusting or from anxious to calm depending on our voice reflections.
There are three main types of voices we can use while negotiating:
- The first voice is a little deeper, slow and calm voice. Some negotiators refer to this as the late night radio DJ voice.
- The second voice is the positive playful voice.
- The third voice is the assertive or direct voice and it is one that rarely needs to be used as it elicits a guarded and defensive response because it communicates dominance and aggression. You will want to use the positive and playful voice most of the time. This is the voice of an easy going, good natured person. If this is hard for you, picture yourself relaxed and smiling while you’re talking. A smile will have an tonal impact on the other person, even when you’re talking on the phone.
The first voice (speaking clearly, slower and with a deeper voice reflection) lets your counterpart know you have everything covered and are in control. This is the method we use most in the SEAL teams when talking and negotiating with potential terrorists.
This week, play around with the three voices and practice them with others and see what kind of reactions they provoke.
