Honestly, the key to creating safety in teams is to first realize and acknowledge how much we crave it as humans.
We are biologically wired to need safe environments and relationships. When we feel safe around others, our brains release certain chemicals called dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin to encourage our bodies to keep forming and experiencing those bonds.
These are some of the same chemicals that form in parent/child relationships at a very early age. In his book The Culture Code: Secrets of Highly Successful Groups, author Daniel Coyle accurately points out that, “We are built to require lots of (safety) signaling over and over. This is why a sense of belonging is easy to destroy and hard to build.”
Even though sending a single belonging cue can be huge, we can’t give just one cue and expect the safety to magically appear. We need to keep sending belonging cues and continually feed the relationship with “you are valued” signals.
Similar to a married couple only saying “I love you” at the altar and then never again expressing it will not bode well for deepening their intimacy in the relationship.
What does the narrative with those around you look and sound like? This week, how can you improve that narrative and build a stronger environment of belonging?
